I tend to think about things for a bit before sharing with others. I also really like to fix things. This combination can sometimes lead to jumping into solution mode really fast when I’m discussing with others. This happened yesterday when I realized the person I was having a conversation with didn’t even agree on the same problem I was coming to him with. And I was already talking about potential solutions! Our conversation didn’t get far and I had to back up and start again.
Since a big part of my job is coming up with solutions, I think it’s important to get it right. It’s also important to know when solutions are necessary. I jotted these notes down based on my conversation yesterday and others that I’ve learned from in the past:
When someone is coming to me with a problem:
- Listen.
- Give them a very quick high level overview of what they are saying so you know you have it right.
- Ask if it’s something they want help with solving or if they are just venting. If they are just venting, move on to other topics.
- If they want a solution: Agree on the problem(s) they would like to solve. Contribute additional info and suggestions if needed.
- Ask them for their thoughts on how to solve. Add your suggestions and agree on a path forward.
- Follow though and follow up.
When I’m going to someone with a problem I’m observing that directly effects me:
- Clearly communicate the problem from my perspective.
- Ask if they understand to get on the same page with them about problem I’m trying to solve.
- See if they agree it’s a problem to solve. If it is, ask the other person for their thoughts on how to solve. Add your suggestions.
- Agree on a path forward. Make it clear who will do what.
- Follow though and follow up.
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